What are things a caregiver should not do? A comprehensive guide to avoid common mistakes

September 28, 2025 •

5 min read

According to the Family Caregiver Alliance, over 70% of caregivers report having to juggle multiple responsibilities, making it easy to overlook their own needs. This guide explores crucial areas and answers the question: what are things a caregiver should not do? to maintain a healthy and sustainable caregiving relationship.

Quick Summary

Caregivers should never neglect their own well-being, violate professional or personal boundaries, or make medical and financial decisions without proper authority. They must avoid physical or emotional abuse, overstepping limits with a patient's dignity, and neglecting crucial self-care to prevent burnout.

Key Points

Avoid Financial Exploitation: Never misuse the care recipient's finances or accept large gifts to prevent accusations of financial exploitation and legal issues.
Respect Privacy and Dignity: Preserve the care recipient's sense of self by respecting their privacy, personal space, and avoiding condescending language.
Maintain Boundaries: Learn to set and enforce clear personal and professional boundaries to prevent burnout and foster a healthy caregiving relationship.
Prioritize Self-Care: Neglecting your own physical and mental health is a critical mistake that can lead to exhaustion, resentment, and a decline in care quality.
Do Not Make Unauthorized Decisions: Avoid making medical or legal decisions without proper authority. Refer questions to qualified professionals and maintain clear communication.
Ensure Safety: Never abandon or neglect a person in your care. Always prioritize their safety and well-being, avoiding physical or emotional harm.

Ethical and Professional Boundaries

Maintaining clear and healthy boundaries is paramount for any caregiver, whether professional or a family member. Crossing these lines can lead to strained relationships, burnout, and serious legal consequences. It's vital to remember that your role is to assist, not to take over the care recipient's life or make decisions they are capable of making themselves.

Do Not Take Financial Advantage

This is one of the most serious and common pitfalls for caregivers. Financial exploitation of a vulnerable person, even if unintentional, can have severe legal repercussions.

Do not take or “borrow” money from the care recipient.
Do not have access to their bank accounts or credit cards unless legally authorized, and even then, maintain meticulous records.
Do not accept large gifts, loans, or additions to a will. This can create the appearance of coercion and lead to legal issues with other family members.
Do not sign legal documents on their behalf without a valid Power of Attorney (POA).

Do Not Violate Patient Privacy and Confidentiality

Respecting the patient's privacy is a fundamental aspect of ethical caregiving. It builds trust and preserves their dignity.

Do not share the patient's medical information, personal struggles, or private affairs with friends, other family members, or on social media without explicit consent.
Do not disregard their personal space. Always knock before entering their room and ask permission when assisting with tasks like dressing.

Do Not Overstep Professional Limitations

Especially for non-medical caregivers, there are strict limits to the type of assistance that can be provided. Overstepping these can put the care recipient at risk and expose the caregiver to liability.

Do not administer medications, injections, or IV treatments unless you are a licensed medical professional and are authorized to do so. You can, however, provide medication reminders.
Do not diagnose medical conditions or offer medical advice. Refer all medical questions to a doctor or other healthcare provider.
Do not perform invasive medical procedures, such as changing sterile dressings or treating complex wounds.

Emotional and Psychological Mistakes

The emotional landscape of caregiving is complex. A caregiver's actions can significantly impact the care recipient's mental and emotional well-being. Avoiding these mistakes is crucial for fostering a supportive and respectful relationship.

Do Not Neglect the Person's Dignity

Compassionate care is centered on preserving the dignity of the person being cared for, not treating them as a child or a burden.

Do not speak to them in a condescending or patronizing manner. Use adult-to-adult language.
Do not make them feel ashamed or embarrassed, especially during sensitive tasks like bathing or toileting.
Do not disregard their privacy. Respect their personal space and belongings.

Do Not Argue or Correct a Person with Dementia

For those caring for a person with dementia, arguing or correcting them is counterproductive and can cause distress.

Instead of correcting, use redirection and validation. Focus on their feelings, not the facts of the situation.
Instead of arguing, offer simple choices to give them a sense of control without creating overwhelm.

Do Not Judge or Blame

It is not a caregiver's place to judge the care recipient's past, lifestyle, or choices. The role is to provide compassionate, non-judgmental support.

Do not make negative remarks or display frustrating body language. Be patient and calm, especially during challenging moments.

Caregiver Self-Negligence and Burnout

Failing to care for yourself is one of the most critical mistakes a caregiver can make. Burnout is a serious condition that can lead to decreased quality of care, resentment, and a decline in your own health.

Do Not Neglect Your Own Health

Do not sacrifice your sleep, nutrition, or exercise. You cannot pour from an empty cup.
Do not ignore your own medical appointments, even if you feel too busy.
Do not isolate yourself. Maintain your social life and hobbies outside of your caregiving duties.

Do Not Refuse Help

Trying to do everything yourself is a surefire path to exhaustion. Accepting help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

Do not turn down offers of assistance from family, friends, or respite care services.
Do not be stubborn. Communicate your needs and limitations clearly and honestly.

Comparison of Healthy vs. Unhealthy Caregiving Behaviors


Healthy Caregiving Behavior	Unhealthy Caregiving Behavior	Consequences
Communicating needs and limits openly with family and patient	Refusing help and trying to do everything alone	Caregiver burnout, resentment, and decreased quality of care.
Encouraging independence and offering choices	Taking control of everything and making all decisions	Loss of dignity and independence for the care recipient, power struggles.
Respecting dignity and privacy	Being condescending or disregarding personal space	Strained relationship, emotional distress, and lack of trust.
Setting clear boundaries with finances and tasks	Mixing personal and patient finances without authority	Accusations of exploitation, legal repercussions, family disputes.
Prioritizing self-care and taking breaks	Ignoring personal health and sleep for caregiving duties	Exhaustion, poor decision-making, and personal health decline.

Do Not Abandon or Endanger the Client

Patient safety should always be the top priority. This includes both physical and emotional safety.

Do not leave a person who requires supervision alone.
Do not use physical force or violence, under any circumstances.
Do not neglect the patient's basic needs, such as food, water, and hygiene.
Do not mishandle equipment in a way that could cause harm.

Documentation and Communication Errors

Poor communication and disorganized records can lead to serious errors and family conflicts. Keeping accurate records and communicating effectively are essential skills for a caregiver.

Do not keep poor records of medical appointments, medications, and health changes. Maintaining a detailed log is crucial.
Do not fail to communicate effectively with other family members or healthcare providers, especially regarding changes in the patient's condition.

The Power of Saying No

Learning to say no is a skill many caregivers need to develop. You cannot be a successful, long-term caregiver if you say yes to every request, especially if it compromises your well-being or oversteps your boundaries.

Saying no can protect your time, energy, and emotional well-being.
Set realistic goals and expectations for what you can provide.
Learn to prioritize your time and energy, and delegate tasks when possible.
For more on the importance of self-respect and boundary setting, visit the Family Caregivers of British Columbia website.

Conclusion: Fostering a Sustainable and Respectful Relationship

By understanding and avoiding these common pitfalls, caregivers can build a more sustainable, respectful, and healthier relationship with the person they are caring for. Caregiving is a challenging but rewarding role, and it requires continuous learning and self-awareness. Recognizing your limits, respecting the dignity of the care recipient, and prioritizing your own self-care are not selfish acts—they are essential components of providing high-quality, compassionate care for the long haul.

Frequently Asked Questions

The most common legal mistakes include mismanaging a patient's finances without a valid Power of Attorney, signing legal documents on their behalf, and making unauthorized medical decisions. These actions can lead to accusations of exploitation and serious legal consequences.

To avoid burnout, a caregiver should prioritize self-care by getting enough sleep, eating well, and exercising. They must also learn to set clear boundaries, say no to overwhelming requests, accept help from others, and maintain a social life outside of caregiving responsibilities.

When caring for someone with dementia, a caregiver should not argue or correct them. Instead, they should use redirection, offer simple choices, and focus on validating their emotional state. Arguing can cause agitation and distress.

Respecting a patient's dignity is crucial for building trust and maintaining a healthy relationship. A caregiver should avoid patronizing language, respect privacy, and ensure the patient feels valued, not like a burden, to preserve their emotional well-being.

Family caregivers should avoid poor communication, such as failing to provide updates or not discussing the care plan openly. They should also avoid taking on all responsibility alone and should be clear about their own needs and limits to prevent resentment.

No, a caregiver should never take personal items from a patient. This is considered theft and can lead to legal action and a complete loss of trust. It is a severe ethical and professional violation.

Unless it is a life-threatening safety matter, a caregiver should not force a patient to do something they don't want to. It is important to respect their choices and autonomy. Forcing them can cause distress and resistance.